Posts by Valerie Friedlander

Setting healthy boundaries is a process that improves with practice. Part of the challenge of setting boundaries is that most of us didn’t grow up with examples of healthy boundaries. Additionally, the media often idolize emmeshed relationships. Consider how many songs and stories idealize relationships where someone’s emotional wellbeing is dependent on one other person.…

Dealing with impostor syndrome is a topic commonly and historically focused on working women. Most women have experienced the feelings of self-doubt and fear of not being good enough despite their accomplishments. Of course, working women aren’t the only ones who experience self-doubt. So, why are we the focus for this topic? We are social…

Silencing your inner critic can help you start to get out of your own way but there’s a more effective way. Using the silencing technique is only a temporary solution for two key reasons: First, it fails to address why the inner critic showed up. Second, it means you’re spending energy fighting yourself instead of…

Become empowered by your emotions, rather than stuck in them, by understanding their purpose or lack thereof. It’s important to remember that though “feelings aren’t facts,” they still matter. They are an intrinsic part of our whole humanness. Supporting emotional wellbeing starts with embracing the value of emotional information. Despite some of that information being…

To emotional awareness and, beyond that, to USING that awareness is this week’s topic. As we explored last week, you must first find the emotions and allow space for them. Following that, you can learn how to use them in a helpful rather than harmful way. This is also called being responsive rather than reactive…

Fantastic emotions and where to find them guides you to where you begin to access your power within your emotions. You often hear emotions spoken of as powerful. However, it’s really YOU who are powerful. The problem is we aren’t taught to understand the dynamics of our emotions. Instead, we are conditioned to avoid unpleasant…

Deep self-care is necessary to shift habits in an effective and healthy way. The “stop it” or “just do it” model often isn’t sustainable and can even be harmful. Habits make up a lot of the way we show up in life. Thus, they can become confused with personality and limit what we believe possible.…

Do you want to build a habit? Or does the idea stress you out? Habits are often a focal point in conversations around personal development, business development, career development, etc. When we talk about habits the conversation is usually about changing them and the emphasis is on control. These conversations are often full of sense…

Give yourself a break, you are not a machine. Hustle culture tells us that we should have everything planned, systematized, and organized. It says that, if you do this well enough, then you will be successful, happy, and stress-free. But failure is part of growth. Unhappiness, discomfort, anger, overwhelm, etc. are normal emotions when it’s…

Finding time to proactively plan is hard in a world where our attention is constantly in demand. It is especially difficult to find time to plan when your plan involves doing something new. First, you must navigate a society designed to keep you busy – physically busy, mentally busy, emotionally busy. Second, you must face…